I’ve probably blogged about spiders before. I’m arachnophobic, and I don’t just mean I don’t like them.
They’ve been stalking me lately. I keep finding them in and around the house. It’s like they know how I feel about them, and they target me deliberately. I just found one in my toilet, abusing the surface tension of water. The cheek of him! However, that was a simple fix – two flushes later, he was dead and gone. The thing that really freaks me out is how the hell he got there, and how I didn’t see him sooner. I drink a lot of tea, you know, which means I end up in that room pretty frequently! How many times I had been without knowing that little critter was lurking?
Every time I see a spider, I become convinced that they’re everywhere. In my mind, I can’t escape them. Certain places or objects are worse than others; I can’t use a clothesline because I associate them strongly with spider inhabitation, and anywhere I’ve already seen a spider becomes forever a place to be wary of.
Sometimes the phobia seems to be getting better, and I freak out less. I get optimistic and think maybe it will downgrade to a simple fear or dislike. But then it blossoms to full force again. These fluctuations don’t seem to have anything to do with how many spiders I’ve seen lately or anything; they seem random. I’m actually in a slightly-less-phobic period right now, despite being stalked. It’s nice, and I hope it lasts this time.