Worst nightmare

One of my huge paranoias is finding a spider on the back of the toilet door. By the time you know it is there, you’re already half naked in an enclosed space, and then you have to get closer to it again to leave the room.
This dreaded event finally happened to me last night. Fortunately it was only a daddy long legs, which I find relatively bearable. But it was still not a pleasant experience.

Spiders again, bloody hell!

Here’s one I sprayed earlier.

I’ve probably blogged about spiders before. I’m arachnophobic, and I don’t just mean I don’t like them.

They’ve been stalking me lately. I keep finding them in and around the house. It’s like they know how I feel about them, and they target me deliberately. I just found one in my toilet, abusing the surface tension of water. The cheek of him! However, that was a simple fix – two flushes later, he was dead and gone. The thing that really freaks me out is how the hell he got there, and how I didn’t see him sooner. I drink a lot of tea, you know, which means I end up in that room pretty frequently! How many times I had been without knowing that little critter was lurking?

Every time I see a spider, I become convinced that they’re everywhere. In my mind, I can’t escape them. Certain places or objects are worse than others; I can’t use a clothesline because I associate them strongly with spider inhabitation, and anywhere I’ve already seen a spider becomes forever a place to be wary of.

Sometimes the phobia seems to be getting better, and I freak out less. I get optimistic and think maybe it will downgrade to a simple fear or dislike. But then it blossoms to full force again. These fluctuations don’t seem to have anything to do with how many spiders I’ve seen lately or anything; they seem random. I’m actually in a slightly-less-phobic period right now, despite being stalked. It’s nice, and I hope it lasts this time.